So Undeniably Retro
Why do people run away? Why do we suffer so much from our mistakes that we feel the need to pack up and move to where no one knows who we were and what we did? Why do we hide behind the illusion that the past won't catch up and the excess baggage won't be a burden? Show me somebody who doesn't want to be a better person, and I'll show you what a liar and a hypocrite looks like. We all make mistakes, though some are better at it than most (and I'm one of them), but there is such a thing as learning.
Over drinks last Friday, my friend's Aussie housemate said that the expats here are all running away from something. And he's right. For Europeans, they get treated like gods and enjoy five figure salaries easy (even if most of them never went to college). For the rest of us, we get a fresh start earning money in a month that would, otherwise, take us a year. Collectively, we are lured by the promise of a better life. Not without consequences, however. With the anonymity comes certain disadvantages. Having no bad reputation also means not having a good one. Existing societal standards are used to view a person, and the biases here are just apalling. For a country that boasts of innovation and progress, it's ironic to see that discrimination is alive and more than well. Them white-skinned folks get the license to treat us third world insects exactly as they perceive us, idiots who went to crappy schools, servants who are used to poverty, and amorals who can sacrifice principles for money.
After a while, you get used to it and you learn to rise above it all. Others would say that ignoring bad behavior will encourage more of it, but I'd rather let it pass in indifference. It would be futile to fight against decades of norms when I can simply slide past and take what I can in terms of experience and knowledge. What's the use of getting pissed over a fact that I don't have the power to change?
In the end, I'm the better person, for not losing my cool over blatant discrimination and mindless ridicule, for shrugging off snide comments that aren't true anyways, for not giving them the power over my emotions. It doesn't matter if they think I sleep around to get favors, that I'm stupid and illiterate, that I had a difficult life back home, that I am nothing. They can gossip and stab my back all they want, because as long as there's one or two people who see me for me and know the unedited truth about my life, I'll be okay.
Over drinks last Friday, my friend's Aussie housemate said that the expats here are all running away from something. And he's right. For Europeans, they get treated like gods and enjoy five figure salaries easy (even if most of them never went to college). For the rest of us, we get a fresh start earning money in a month that would, otherwise, take us a year. Collectively, we are lured by the promise of a better life. Not without consequences, however. With the anonymity comes certain disadvantages. Having no bad reputation also means not having a good one. Existing societal standards are used to view a person, and the biases here are just apalling. For a country that boasts of innovation and progress, it's ironic to see that discrimination is alive and more than well. Them white-skinned folks get the license to treat us third world insects exactly as they perceive us, idiots who went to crappy schools, servants who are used to poverty, and amorals who can sacrifice principles for money.
After a while, you get used to it and you learn to rise above it all. Others would say that ignoring bad behavior will encourage more of it, but I'd rather let it pass in indifference. It would be futile to fight against decades of norms when I can simply slide past and take what I can in terms of experience and knowledge. What's the use of getting pissed over a fact that I don't have the power to change?
In the end, I'm the better person, for not losing my cool over blatant discrimination and mindless ridicule, for shrugging off snide comments that aren't true anyways, for not giving them the power over my emotions. It doesn't matter if they think I sleep around to get favors, that I'm stupid and illiterate, that I had a difficult life back home, that I am nothing. They can gossip and stab my back all they want, because as long as there's one or two people who see me for me and know the unedited truth about my life, I'll be okay.
I love who I've become and I intend to continue what I've started. Not for one second do I regret the excess luggage I'm lugging around now because without it I wouldn't have had the courage and audacity to change. Kudos to those select few who held on no matter where I was in my life. You all have been great!
So here's to NOT hitting delete on my past, to pressing page down on put downs, and new post on my life. To those I left behind, I'll see you soon. Count on it.
whispered by E-vil at 10:08 AM
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